Wednesday, February 10, 2010

There are few things I hate more than when a stranger rings my doorbell in the middle of the day. Mostly because I am always caught with a dirty house, and no makeup. And on this particular day I was caught with sick kids that were still in pajamas at 1:00. In these situations, I usually stare at whoever is standing outside my door through my peep-hole, and wait for said stranger (who ALWAYS has a clipboard) to leave my house. (It usually takes a few knocks and doorbell rings because he can hear my kids screaming, "MOM! ANSWER THE DOOR, WHO IS IT?") This man seemed too dressed up for security system sales, and he was older than the average Winder Dairy Salesman, so curiosity got the best of me, and I opened the door.

Here is the conversation that my brother and I had after this guy left (via instant message).

Me: Sorry (I was gone), funeral salesman at the door. Um, REALLY, door to door funeral sales?
Greg: REALLY??
Me: Yeah.
Greg: Does he know you have sick kids or something? "Hello, the word on the street is that you have sick kids. Today is your lucky day, we're having a half off sale!"
Me: Who SELLS funerals?
Greg: Um, death?
Me: Um, someone who is planning on killing you?
Me: "Hello, Ma'am. I'd like to talk to you about your impending death."
Greg: I would have been like, "You're older than I am. Have you planned yours?"
Me: Are death rates so slow that they need to sell the idea of dying? This IS a bad economy!
Greg: When Mandy and I got married the local funeral home sent us a brochure. Then a family tree book.
Me: Hopefully with a note that said, "Sorry we sent those in the wrong order!'

These little conversations get me through the day. Even if they are due to Funeral Salesmen.


Kendal and Alissa said...

HA HA the same thing happened to me probably with that exact same salesman. It was in the middle of the afternoon and I was caught in my pajamas too. (But I didn't have the excuse of sick kids:) I had just finished giving Savanna lunch so she was just in a onsie. I usually never open the door, but like you my curiosity got the best of me. He was trying to make some small talk and said "He's such a cute little guy. How old is he?" I just answered his questions, but he felt stupid when he saw her pink car in the background and tried to recover from his earlier statement. Oh I really do hate door to door sales!

Robbins said...

Either I am out of my house too much or I am lucking out, because I can't remember the last time I had a door-to-door salesman and I live right by you! (And next-door to Alissa!) Either way, score!

That would be completely weird!! I think I would have busted out in loud laughter right there at the door. WHO takes a job like that?

Deon said...

This is a new one for me--funeral salesmen. Instead of, "Ding, dong, Avon calling!" we have, "Ding, dong, grave-on calling!" Were you looking around for the hidden cameras, cuz this is kind of surreal.

Jodi said...

I'm buying you a "no soliciting" sign for your door! :)

kathryn said...

so that's why you don't answer my impromptu drive-by's... hmmm. well, next time i'll just show up in my pj's, too.

Wilson Family said...

Wow, that's bizarre. Door to door funeral sales... What's next?? And isn't it always the days you aren't dressed or wearing make-up that a stranger, or worse yet someone you know, randomly rings your doorbell... Okay, so maybe I'm never dressed, but it's still annoying.